Taking out the rubbish

Did you take out the rubbish today?

Taking out the rubbish can be a chore but what you are achieving is more space, less clutter, getting rid of the unwanted stuff and making room for new things.

Do you ever take the rubbish out for all the stuff that you gather mentally, emotionally and physically that is no longer serving it's purpose or is starting to impact negatively on your life?

During the time of lockdown I have realised how guilty I have been of not practicing what I preach. I hadn't cleared out the emotional baggage, the negative self talk or unfollowed all the social media accounts that weren't bringing any happiness to me. I kept feeling a looming dread with things but couldn't put my finger on what exactly it was causing it.

I decided to treat myself just like any of my wonderful clients and started to ask myself all the questions that delve into the hidden emotions, the why's behind the emotions, keeping a note of the physical tensions that were reoccurring and starting to join the dots to see when the tensions would appear.

Slowly I began to clear out physical items, like clothes, clothes that I knew I had zero intention of wearing, clothes that made me feel like I'm hiding away and trying to blend in with the surroundings. None of them were making me happy - half of them I rolled my eyes at when I seen them and mostly they were just taking up space. What I didn't realise was the freedom I would feel when I cleared them out. The sweet relief at not having to look at them and skip past them when I was wanting to find something to wear. It stopped that 'I have nothing to wear' mentality. I would rather have literally nothing to wear than look at the stuff that was occupying the space.

So what, it was only a wardrobe clear out - wrong! I was ruthless, I cleared out anything that I had any emotional attachment to that was unhealthy, I discovered I had way too many hoodies and really casual clothes that were just uninspiring. Really I've been raising children for that long I had actually lost my own identity but I was ready to do something about it. Out the hoodies went, out the basic worn out t-shirts went and out the 'I might get back into it' clothes went.

Once they were gone I had space in the wardrobe and mentally - what I had actually got rid of was 'I'm just a Mum' , 'I'll have to work harder to slim down', 'sure I'm not going anywhere to wear that'.

Why stop at the clothes? I didn't. The clothes were only scratching the surface of things I had inadvertently held onto internally for years. I had talked myself down into a rut that only I could start working to get myself out of. My outlook on the world was great, encouraging others, supporting them, helping them and making sure I was there when anyone needs me, telling them not to be hard on themselves but to myself I was failing miserably.

I have been caregiving so much and not taking care of myself. I found things overwhelming and I found it hard to stand my ground and speak up for myself. Fear had crept into many areas and all the 'What Ifs' were stopping me letting go of the baggage and allowing me to take care of myself.

Learning to set boundaries for me, that suited me, not what pleased everyone else was the best thing I started to do. Swapping up the social media accounts to brighten and freshen the daily viewing was another clear out. Remember that you are the curator of what you watch on social media.

Emotionally I had held onto things that I was beating myself up with and I had a hard time letting go of. Rose and Frankincense oils became my new BFF's for this clear out. They help to heal emotional wounds in a very gentle way.

I used my Aromatherapy knowledge to make blends for myself that would support me, lessen the anxiety and ones that would help to let things go. Support from essential oils and blended products is not always in the form of easing physical tensions or healing physical wounds - it is fantastic for helping the emotional self too.

Trying to relax properly when you are sitting in with all the rubbish that needs taken out to the bin just doesn't work. You can't learn to switch off truly until you let go of some of your baggage, deal with some of the hurt and start to heal some inner wounds.

Are you ready to start taking out some rubbish?